Awwww….damn. And I was so hopeful that the “nice gentleman” I’d been emailing back and forth with for a total volley of 29 emails! Was really the best selling author trying to help me.
If you’re lost, this post is the follow up to How Will I Know and you can read about “Micheal Monroe Lewis” and his first introduction over there. You should do that before you continue. Seriously. You should.
These scammers are just awful but a lot of fun to play with if you’re in the mood. We’ve gone from the AI based Praise, Prey, and end with a cute little Neg Comment scam to people with ‘secret Facebook groups’ that want to help–and get paid for it, of course, to the Famous Author Scam.
I was wondering how long this would take. I really was, judging by the way it was all going sooner or later someone would contact me under the guise of a famous author wanting to help me. This guy almost got me. I admit it, he had me going for a moment or two, it seems this one actually did five minutes worth of research. Except the name. Always the name.
He is michealmonroelewis@gmail.com
That name is almost right. The famous author’s name actually is Michael Monroe Lewis. But you might want to take a look at the spelling in the email address again.
If you do nothing else, check the damn email address, open that header.
We went on, as I said, for 29 emails. 29 emails in which he evaded the simple question of ‘how did you find me’ about 27 times. This was pretty much the answer he gave each time; “As for how I found you I like connecting with other writers who have a real voice and passion for their craft. Your work reflects that, and I thought it’d be great to reach out.”
A few emails after that, he asked me for my Amazon page and my website. My website is always always always right under my name on every email I send out. How did he miss it? Anyway, I gave him the website address. Got hits from China that day. Weird, huh?
I don’t have any real idea of how he found me. That’s always a clue, right? Some famous best-selling author (one I didn’t know from ‘Adam’ thankfully, I would have shit a brick if they said they were Stephen King!) just pops into your email one day because they like to be friendly and ‘connect’ with other authors but they can’t tell you how they found you or what you write. Oh, yes, and their name isn’t spelled correctly. If you’re out there Mr. & Mrs. Scammer, that’s STEPHEN…no ‘V’. The middle name is EDWIN. If you need it.
If you try it, I will have more fun with you than I did with Micheal.
We went on, him thinking he was in charge, and me dropping bread crumbs like I was Hansel and him ignoring them. It was quite amusing.
For me.
He even dropped a few bits about his biggest seller, Liar’s Poker, for effect. Except I’m pretty sure he got the comments off an interview with the real author or possibly Amazon reviews. Not sure there, but trust and believe, I never let up on those bread crumbs or checking him out.
Of course I jellied him nice the whole while. I profusely apologized for not knowing who he was and how silly he must think I am for offering to toss out a link for him! Oh, my, silly silly girl. Once I had him believing that I believed him I told him all about this scams and, of course, how lucky he was not to have to deal with them.
Hint. Hint. Dumbass!
I told him how hubby and I are out of work and I can’t afford marketing, in fact I’d shot my load for this year.
Hint. MF’n hint.
I told him how these scams had made me untrusting of people.
Big red neon sign, darling!
He asked me what my most rewarding moment was in writing?
I was dead honest with him through this whole thing, in case you can’t tell, and I didn’t give him any information one cannot find when doing a ‘deep dive’ on Your Truly. So I told him the truth again; I had received emails from people (I never ever call them ‘fans’) thanking me for 1-saving their marriage and 2-their lives. When I sit back and think back on that knowing that the 2 people who nearly ended it all and I had something to do with changing their minds are, all these years later, alive and healthy. The person who I said I saved their marriage, all these years later, is still married and happily so.
A best selling book cannot beat that.
I’m sorry.
It just can’t.
That doesn’t mean I’ll be stupid and outright turn down the legitimate chance at a solid book deal or movie deal…HELLO HBO! ARE YOU OUT THERE NETFLIX? THIS IS YOUR NEXT “GAME OF THRONES”. Yeah, no, I’m not going to turn that down.
But I’m not falling for some scam either.
Anyway, we are coming to The End and the Best Parts……
After he finally asked me about marketing and I told him I’d done it all and how lucky he was to have a marketing team, I got the email I had been waiting for.
Here it is.
I really admire that grit and determination it’s what keeps indie authors going, and you’ve clearly put so much of yourself into every step of this journey. That said, I’ve learned along the way just how much of a difference it can make to have an expert involved. Not because they replace that fire, but because they help channel it so the effort has a bigger impact.
I completely understand that cost is often the biggest roadblock, especially after everything you’ve already invested. If you don’t mind, I could connect you with the expert I work with and her team. She’s approachable, easy to talk to, and genuinely cares about the authors she helps. You could be upfront with her about your situation including the financial side and she’d listen and work with you.
No pressure at all, but if you’d like, I’d be glad to make that introduction.
I knew this was some Three Party BS! Wait, hold it, it at least LOOKS LIKE some Three Part BS.
I wrote back:
Oh my! That would be wonderful! Thank you so much. You have no idea how much this means to me.
Looking forward to her email.
Check out his next email:
Thanks for deciding to connect with Susan I’m confident she’ll be a great help to you, just as she has been to me. You can reach her directly at susan.naylor.books.expert@gmail.com. She’s very approachable, and if you drop her a note, she’ll gladly share details about what she offers and how her step-by-step method works.
How legit is that email address, do you think? Do you think it actually even goes to some woman named ‘Susan’? Or is ‘Micheal’ going to get it under another account?
I thanked him politely then sat back and waited for 1-“her” to email me or 2- Micheal to stay involved. Micheal did not disappoint.
Sept. 30th: I’m really glad I could connect you with her. I’d love to hear how your conversation goes once you’ve had the chance to chat no rush, just curious to see how it works out for you.
I thanked him and he wrote back:
That’s great to hear. I really hope the chat gives you a bit of fresh perspective it always helps having someone else in your corner. I’ll be looking forward to hearing how it goes when you’re ready to share.
All the best,
Michael
I did not answer him.
October 2nd: Hi Lisa, I just wanted to check in how’s your conversation with the expert going so far? I’d love to hear how things are shaping up for you.
By this time I’d had enough. I’m sorry, I really did want to email ‘Susan’ and drag this out a bit more just to get to The Rub. But, I wanted to let him know the jig was up too. So I emailed him back.
Hi,
Right now I am literally hip deep in cannabis. The harvest has come in and there’s lots to do after the drying, trimming, and weighing is done, I have batches of tincture, gummies, honey, sugar and more to make. Of course, candle season is once again upon us and orders are coming in. I will definitely get in touch with your girl when things calm down around here.
I haven’t heard back from him! I really would have loved to have seen his face when he read that.
I’m not lying! The harvest did come in but, if this was legit I’d still be all the hell over it. I’d be typing with one hand while decarbing with the other and stirring honey with my clean toes if I had to.
I thought about the phrase ‘your girl’ several times. It made me chuckle. It made me smile. It made me laugh. It stayed.
Now I’m just going to sit back and wait for my Fan Letter from Steve N. King who is just dying to help me, I’m sure.
Lisa Beth Darling 